New in Germany – Struggling to Make Friends, Any Advice?

It’s difficult. My advice would be: try to befriend internationals and wait for them to introduce you to their occasional German friend. From then on, just pray the German will bring you into their circle

I had a pretty rough go of it when I first moved too, but a few things that helped were, participating in hobbies that included others which resulted in German and international friends, meeting people at my local pub that would want to hang out, and the hardest part, learn German if you can’t speak it already, even just being at a learners level but enough to try and strike up conversations helped me big time.

I know the loneliness you’re feeling, but hang in there, it gets better.

You can make a Schneemann

Ideally, you should meet them at primary school and keep them for the rest of your life. Otherwise, it’ll be like playing five-dimensional chess.

you can’t. Unless you went to kindergarten with germans. Even Verein friends are just acquaintances

Stop hanging out on the side of the road.

Lol, just kidding. I am too struggling here…. even in the city! Munich is big but I recently moved here.

I think the magic Vereine is supposed to be the ticket out of loneliness. I will let post back as I am supposed to meet this tennis club here, and I can let you know.

How did you end up in Verden?

Even for a lot of Germans it is difficult top find friends past a certain age. And even in such a small town. Had to google it. There is less than 30.000 people in Verden.

Best way to meet people is to join a “Verein”. But only if you are interested in the topic. Can be anything: Sailing, Gun Club, Bridge … You may not find friends very quickly. But it’s always fun to do something that you enjoy with others. That would at least address your loneliness. If I were you my first choice would be probably [Wassersportverein Verden e.V.](https://wsv-verden.de/) and then maybe a cycling club.

But honestly … unless you have to stay in Verden. I would probably looking into moving into a bigger city. Bremen? There should be way

I wish I could move there. Unfortunately I’m stuck in America.

Find a club of something you enjoy doing. That’s how I found nearly all of my friends in my new town in the US.

Go to pubs and strike up impromptu conversation.
Good topic is letting people know you are looking to learn the language.

Man I know that area, you are playing the “Find Friends in Germany Game” on extra hard mode.
My advice would be to move to a bigger City, Bremen for example. Very open and Lot of young – ish people there

just leave Germany and the friends will appear automatically

So I would go to a Sportverein. Mostly should be Football but there should be definitely be some others like tennis, fight sport,… just try to also look in the neighbour villages. And when you get to know a few people now, and you are interested in partying you should just joined the village party’s. There should be the “osterfeuer” in spring. For “vatertag” a lot of people to day drinking in friend groups at a walking tour (but there a a lot of times big grouped where also people bring new friends etc). In summer is “domweih” and than in autum there should be “Schützenfest” and “erntefest” in multiple villages nearby and also “langwedler markt”. So I would try to find a few people that I like and than just ask if you can join them at the party’s and you will get to know a lot of people. 

A few things that helped me establish a network of close German friends (outside of learning the language):

1. Don’t limit your possibilities. Like most other foreigners, I arrived hoping to make German friends around my age, with the same interests. However, it was socializing with Germans almost 10-20 years older that helped me not only make friends, but also find German friends my age. Older people have kids and grandkids and also host parties and barbecues. Just because they might not like your exact music or hobbies, they can be a source of wisdom, laughter, and meeting others.

2. Show an interest in the history, traditions, and culture of your region. It’s nearly impossible for immigrants to Germany to assimilate 100%, but too many show a lack of interest in the world around them. Attend annual events. Join a verein. Ask people about why things are said or done a certain way (show curiosity). Try different foods.

Germans seem to warm up to people who make an effort to put themselves out there and indicate they’re not just in Germany for financial reasons.

3. Become a regular at a restaurant (not a bar). It sounds silly, but restaurant owners tend to know a lot of people in town and they often value loyal customers. If they light up when they see you, it doesn’t go unnoticed by others—who might be interested in getting to know you as well.

Is Hannover handy on the train for you? If so, there is an active RBL there which has loads going on, and a reasonable mix of ages. That might at least be a start.

Bigger cities/towns if you can.

Also – it’s easier in spring/summer so if nothing happens don’t worry – you may need to be patient!

Failing that, chat with the older patient people and let them know you want to practive your German. They may not be the people in your target group, but they might know the people in your target group

even small towns in Germany will have a voluntary firefighter station, which offers great opportunities to make friends and build connections within the local community. Plus, you’re doing something that actually helps others, which feels nice!

Only problem: you will need to speak German. That’s probably the one obstacle that most internationals I know who don’t seem to find community will face. if you don’t already speak at least on B2 level (ideally even C1), then improving your language is the one most effective thing you can do.

Friendships in Germany are not fast, and if you are over 30, even more difficult. Dont give up, and if you live in a small town, consider going to events in bigger towns and group events.

Verein for something you want to do (Segeln, Schwimmen, etc).

Sign up for Hochschulsport (maybe in Bremen).

Sign up for dance classes.

[Meetup.com](http://Meetup.com) -> See if events are going on close by (e.g. Bremen ;-))

Although you don’t live in Bremen participate in Bremen’s more active live you still can get there by train…

It is not easy to make new friends in Germany, I recommend to try everything at once!

Wish you good luck!

Verden and Langwedel is an area in which people have horses as far as I remember. Maybe there are riding clubs? Not a cheap hobby tho.