Weight loss experience

The other day I published a post on r/askcroatiabut it was removed because it belongs more to this sub. As there were interesting comments and discussions, I decided to repost it with an update.

Briefly about me: 29 years old, gave birth twice by caesarean section, the last in June 2025. Entered the second pregnancy with 70 kg, at birth 85, now 50 kg. Height 158cm.

It is a topic that arouses interest and strong reactions among many, especially among those who have been struggling with excess weight for a long time. I myself was one of them, so I write from my own experience because I understand what overweight people go through. Namely, the weight burden is not only physical but also deeply emotional, no matter how much you focus on the health risks of obesity.

Therefore, I will summarize my experience and present in a few points what I have learned along the way with the hope that it will be useful to someone. I rely on frequent questions asked by friends and acquaintances.

1. Time will pass anyway

I was always waiting for something, a new Monday, a new year, an annual, just for xy to pass. I went to bed every night thinking that my life would be better if I wasn’t fat, you lied that I was "done" and that I’ve been on a diet since the second day since I’d put on half a kilo of wafers. And the second day again in the vicious circle of dissatisfaction and emotional overeating. The truth is that there is no ideal moment, and time will pass anyway. Change does not happen overnight, but a few months or years is also not a lot of time to achieve such an important goal, which is important to realize. Therefore, the sooner we start, the sooner we will reach the goal.

1. Don’t lie to yourself

The most common lies I told myself: "I’m not THAT fat" (hm, spontaneous pictures don’t lie), “I could take off if I wanted to," “I’ll take it off in a week"“I just have to stop eating". But when I got on the ball and took a realistic look at my habits, it was clear where the pounds came from; I ate a lot, moved minimally and was fatter than I thought. Change begins only when we honestly admit to ourselves where we are.

1. Face the misconceptions

Misconception no. 1. I just need to stop eating. Food is necessary for us to live. Most people who experience the yo-yo effect cut their food intake to once or twice a day, and at the first more sensitive shift, the devil returns everything with interest. It is true that there is no diet that will end and after which we will return to “normal” eating. It was this “normal” that led us to +15, +20 or more kilos. If nothing changes in the long term, the result will not be long term either.

Misconception no. 2. Homemade means healthy. We like to justify homemade cakes, homemade rolls, calorie bombs from lunch (breaded, fried, large amounts of pasta, fatty salads, etc.) because it’s homemade = healthy. I realized how much oil and fat I use in everyday cooking. Namely, one tablespoon of oil has about 120 calories, and many do not save it when cooking. The same applies to sugar. Little by little, imperceptibly, the calories add up.

1. BMR and TDEE (first heard about it at almost 30 years old)

BMR (or basal metabolic rate) is the amount of calories the body burns at complete rest. TDEE (total daily energy expenditure) is the actual daily energy consumption. For many women, this is between 1600 and 2000 calories per day. When I realized how little food my body actually needed, I was unpleasantly surprised. For me (low) BMR is only 1200kcal, and with 45 minutes of some kind of slightly stronger cardio, I spend barely 300kcal. To lose (or gain) 1 kg of fat tissue, it is necessary to create a caloric deficit (or surplus) of approximately 7,000 to 7,700 kcal. This means that we can very easily eat a surplus even when we feel that we are eating “normally”, but also create a deficit with the help of the strategy from the following points.

1. Counting calories and weighing portions

Counting calories turned out to be a major tool in my weight loss. It doesn’t have to last forever (and I’m not counting right now), but in the beginning it’s invaluable because you learn what the actual portions are, how many calories each food has (it’s not just about junk) and you realize where you’re going wrong. In addition, I recommend monitoring macronutrients. ChatGPT helped me in that part. Weighing portions is also important as we develop a sense of quantity. For example, I weighed my pasta, potatoes and flakes and realized how little 30g of flakes, 80g of pasta or 120g of potatoes really is.

1. Meal planning

Planning meals at least one day in advance is essential and prevents impulsive decisions, snacking and “just something in a hurry”. It also reduces the emotional burden of constantly thinking about what to eat. Instead of one or two large meals a day, I recommend that you really try to have 5 smaller ones because it was a revival for me. So, I planned 5 meals a day and “saved” calories in advance if I knew I was going to have a more caloric day that week. My focus was on protein, fiber and healthy fats. Breakfast and dinner were similar: eggs, tuna, meat, vegetables, hummus, avocado, bread or crackers. Snack mainly oats or cereal with fruit and added protein. Lunch is always meat or fish with lots of vegetables, without frying or breading. Dessert fruit. Also, I don’t eat after 6 p.m., because even a small bite often triggers a binge. Just as important, forget about juices and sugary coffees. You really don’t need it, and it has an incredible amount of calories. With these habits, I lost 20 kg in 4 months. Now during maintenance I eat more, but the same food I ate during the caloric deficit.

1. The problem is not the food, but the quantity. Or?

Although we often hear that the problem is not the food but the quantity, I would disagree with that. In practice, this simply does not work for most obese people. Sweets and snacks are designed to encourage overeating due to the combination of sugar, fat and salt that strongly activates the reward centers of the brain and very easily leads to a loss of control. That’s why it’s easier for many people to throw them out completely, that is, not to buy them and not keep them at home. Rather, try to find acceptable, healthier alternatives than eating just one row of chocolate or 30g of chips.

1. Exercise is not necessary, but it is a great addition

Many people who are fascinated by my change ask me how much I exercise, as if it is a magical solution to lose weight with the famous 10k steps a day. It’s true that for the first few weeks and pounds I could barely walk because of the c-section, then I started walking and running on the treadmill and finally gave up cardio and started doing strength exercises. Nutrition is at least 80% of success. "You can’t out-exercise a bad diet" – especially if you have a similar build to me. On the other hand, you can lose weight without training. I currently exercise 4-5 times a week for 30-45 minutes because I want to tone up, feel better, and it also helps me control my appetite. But it is not essential or necessary.

I have briefly scratched the surface with these few points, but the issue with thickness is much deeper and more complex. A special topic could be society’s attitude towards obesity and weight loss, from immediate family to friends, colleagues and acquaintances. About that another time.

Finally, I hope my experience will help someone. I am available for any questions.