How as a society have we descended to the point that we need to offer pregnant women an identifier badge to be offered a seat on public transport? I understand that it's not always immediately obvious, but as a mid 30's male I am wondering if it's just not normal anymore for people to volunteer their seats to the elderly, pregnant women and people with mobility impairments?
Posted by Ghost403
26 Comments
Well as you said, its not immediately obvious. And, as the photo of the woman in the poster shows, it’s not immediately obvious.
When my partner was obviously pregnant (say from 5 months onwards), I can’t recall a situation where she wasn’t offered a seat in public.
They are a great flex in London according to my friend. All for it, also gets rid of awkwardness if you offer the seat and she isn’t pregnant
A pregnant woman might not want to be noticed as being pregnant, and a woman who is not pregnant might not want to be mistaken as someone who is.
As a man like yourself, I’d be mortified to offer a seat to a woman who I thought was pregnant but wasn’t, and I daresay she’d not appreciate the effort either if I made it publicly clear why I was doing so…
You also make a more general comment about the decline in what was once referred to as chivalry – which is probably an entire Sociology Phd in itself so I’ll ignore that part.
Maybe … 90% of pregnant people on public transport don’t look pregnant?
Bump often shows up only ~6 or 7 months in, even then they might wear non-revealing clothes. Some ladies are just shaped in a way that they don’t get the classic high bump you’re thinking of.
First trimester ladies are often exhausted and don’t show.
No-one moves now for anyone, especially kids. Back when I was in school all students would stand for adults, pregnant women, disabled, or elderly. A sign of the times.
I’m disappointed they don’t know what ‘lanyard’ means
The problem is, the first trimester, **before you start showing** is often when you feel the worst until you’re basically close to being due (when physical limitations do become more of an issue!) You have the worst nausea, worst dizziness, you’re the most exhausted etc, and no one can even tell. I was fortunate and felt pretty decent throughout my pregnancy but some women feel terrible from the moment they get a positive test until Bub is out.
I personally found people were really lovely when I was pregnant, people stood up without being asked as soon as I had a bump, but in some countries the lanyard is provided by the doctor when your pregnancy is confirmed, and that seems like a pretty good system!
I appreciate this. I am 100% for giving up my seat for anyone who needs it, but the reality is that it can back-fire, like someone who’s a bit older but wants to show the world (and themself) they’re just as capable to stand as they ever were, or someone who’s not pregnant, just has a body shape that might look like they are at a glance.
It’s like the sunflower lanyard: I don’t need any details – you can be pregnant, old, or just coming off a 12-hour shift. Just signal that you need a seat and it’s all yours.
No one wants to end up as Paris Hilton just kissing a big tummy woman
It isn’t always obvious, especially if it’s early in the pregnancy or they are overweight
If you think it’s wise to guess or assume when someone is pregnant…I got some disappointing news for you.
“I’m sad that these people need a way of identifying themselves. I can’t always identify them myself but still”
Are you for real? Lmao peak performative male here
6’4 btw
But I wanna see the lanyard
I’m pretty sure 99% of people are too glued to their phones while on the metro / train to ever notice someone wearing this button.
I once stood up for a lady who I was sure was heavily pregnant. Turns out she wasn’t. And it was fucking embarrassing for both of us.
This is why.
As a fat woman who has been offered a seat and been embarrassed, I can see how this would be helpful.
Not sure if fat or pregnant…. Don’t want to offend…..
Was pregnant a few years ago and I never had a single person offer me a seat on public transport. I was very showy and clearly pregnant, and would stand in front of the occupied pregnant/disability seats with my stomach sticking out, and people would just stay there. In the end I just asked people to move; I was very emotional at the time due to hormones and would always be teary or on the verge of crying as this was happening. People are just too involved with their phones and themselves to notice anyone around them.
Have you never met a fat person?
Not all disabilities are easily seen mate, all good i used to have a similar perception as u
People ignore walking aids, ignoring a badge is easy
Good luck getting people to pay attention to it. They don’t even pay attention to my cane half the time. A small badge might not do much. And they likely won’t even read the posters to see what it’s for.
So called “sighted” people don’t seem to use their sight very much.
Can we have one for Entitled Boomer please? And Full of Ale..
I was obviously pregnant and stood most of the time on the metro and any other public transport we took.
Now that I push a pram I’m also routinely forced off the path by people walking in pairs.
Can’t expect any special, or even decent treatment these days that’s for sure. I honestly don’t know how those with disability manage in our society.
It’s a common thing in Asia, better than assuming someone is pregnant when they aren’t and offending them.
My wife is currently heavily pregnant. She’s so heavily pregnant that she’s no longer out and about doing things, but a few weeks ago when she was we were both shocked by how few fucks anyone gave. Forget offering a seat, people would literally just straight up shove past her to get places. Like literally physically bump her out of the way. She was very very noticeably pregnant at the time, so there really isn’t an excuse for it.
This isn’t some “kids these days” kind of rant either, the worst culprits were middle aged and older women.