Schools tell parents ‘if your child still wears nappies you have to come in and change them yourselves’
https://uk.news.yahoo.com/anger-schools-tell-parents-child-065404181.html?guccounter=1
Posted by OldGuto
Schools tell parents ‘if your child still wears nappies you have to come in and change them yourselves’
https://uk.news.yahoo.com/anger-schools-tell-parents-child-065404181.html?guccounter=1
Posted by OldGuto
25 Comments
About time too! But of course some parents are kicking off about it. All I can say is if your child isn’t potty trained by the age of 4 then maybe you need to be speaking to your GP or someone because the child might have other more serious issues going on.
School?!
That’s just bad, lazy parenting.
We bought our daughter a little toy one with a roll holder and a flush button and sound just before she was 2 and after 6 weeks there was no need for nappies.
This is a real problem – more and more parents expect schools to take over basic parenting. This is a great example of one such instance.
There’s even stuff like teeth-brushing being pushed on schools, it’s ridiculous.
This is more common than it should be. Parents sending kids to school in that state should be referred to social workers. There’s just no need.
Fair. Potty training can be nailed in 2 weeks if you’re consistent about it. (Developmental issues excluded)
Fucking right on. Accountability on parents is at an all time low and needs sorting
Imagine being a parent that’s up in arms about this too. If that’s you: sort your life out and also, kindly go fuck yourself too.
Jeez… what sort of useless idiots can’t potty train a child of 4 years (specific problems aside of course)?
The issue is that if there are additional needs involved, there often isn’t a diagnosis at that age and even if the school agree to start the pathway, it takes years after.
Not to mention, that even when additional needs are diagnosed, the councils insist that mainstream must be attempted no matter how miserable it makes everyone involved.
Fair enough. Partners friend’s child is almost 4 and can’t speak a single word and still wears nappies. They think it’s completely normal also
Yes! My mother was a teachers assistant for some time. After covid, there were kids coming in with nappies, couldn’t speak properly, write properly and they said to her “you sort it”….. she’s not a carer! She looks after all the kids equally. To me seemed like the parents just wanted the attention for having a baby and non of the responsibility for looking after them. (Also most of those parents didn’t work, had a new Range Rover, nails done, etc)
A teachers job is tough enough without having them change nappies for the children of uncaring, and uneducated parents.
I’m sure there are, *’late-developers*’, but a teachers job is to teach, not clean shit up off of a child in their class.
Not being potty-trained at age four, is insane.
If you cannot handle a child, get a rabbit.
My ex Sister in law was planning on starting potty training my nephew when he reaches 4. She said that’s completely normal and couldn’t understand why I was shocked.
100% agree and I hope it also includes a phone call to social services. Unless it’s a health reason, there’s no justification for a 4 year old to require nappies. That is not part of the teacher’s job to stop a lesson to clean up a kid who should be trained.
*Another* thing parents are *expected* to do that they want to pass off to teachers?
It’s ridiculous, my nephews & niece were potty trained by the time they started primary. My sister & family helped them learn. Can’t believe how lazy some parents are these days. It’s the most basic thing you should teach them before school.
Parents shouldn’t treat teachers like they’re free babysitters to clean up after their kids.
A teacher I spoke to recently said she had found parents more focused on their children learning to write the alphabet etc rather than more basic skills such as being able to put their own coat on or using the toilet/potty.
Parents who don’t have their kids potty trained by 4 should pay the school if they have to do it for them. £30 per change. Nappies and cleaning equipment should also be provided by the parents.
There is simply no reason for failing to potty train.
Sparing medical and developmental issues, at what point does this just become neglect.
I tried potty training my two and a half year old back in June and it was an unmitigated disaster. I think I just got too regimented with it, also didn’t introduce the concept of it to him enough either so he was in a state of what the hell is this thing. Just terrible on my part all around.
My childminder said to wait as she has other kids with her starting to go through the potty thing, so he would see that and start getting used to the idea. I’ve also been getting him to sit on the potty at certain times, like when he wakes up or before his bath. Sometimes he doesn’t want to, and other times he does, but he’s more familiar with it now. The plan is to start when he turns 3, which I thought was quite late, but my childminder also potty trained her son at that age and was successful.
Anyway, that was a bit off track, but I would never send my kid to school not being toilet trained. If I fail, then I would definitely pay an expert to come and assist to just get it done. I get they are an added cost, but I’d rather that than my kid soiling themselves everyday at school in front of their peers.
I was at a big outdoor party in the summer and talking to one of the mums of a boy who was playing with mine. He said he needed the toilet and stood waiting for his mum to go with him to wipe his bum.
He was 7. I was shocked and she asked if my son, also 7 still wanted me to go with him to wipe. I couldn’t help, because I was so shocked, telling her that my 4 year old had been able to wipe her own bum for ages.
She looked at me like I was the devil and slowly trudged off to go wipe for him. She never came back to talk to me!
I really couldn’t believe she (or dad) hadn’t taught him to do this himself yet
so many parents don’t actually parent any more. it’s just shove the kid in front of an ipad while scrolling on facebook. they just expect teachers to do everything because real parenting actually takes effort
Obviously there will be exceptions but as a general rule teachers can’t be expected to change shitty nappies and it’s sheer entitlement from some parents thinking they should be. It’s the basics of childcare.
Bring back sure start, things got notably worse when this programme was canned.
I’ve worked in secondary schools and mainly worked with children with behaviour issues and SEN.
Despite that, shit like this is about 90% parents who can’t parent and expect us staff to do it for them.
I understand the comments in here being all “Yes but there could be developmental delays and they’re autistic etc” but that’s not an excuse. Not every child still wearing nappies at 6 has a diagnosis of something. Just accept some parents are fucking shit.
Primary school teacher of twenty years here. Spent many years teaching reception and year 1. The number of pupils starting school without being “potty trained”, in addition to speech and language issues, has been going up for years. COVID didn’t help, but I and many colleagues will tell you this was a pattern *pre*-lockdown.
The reasons are not simply because of “bad parenting”. I think it’s quite complex and we need to recognise this pattern was being observed in classrooms *before* the pandemic.
Sure, some parents struggle with getting their child “school ready”. Probably shouldn’t have closed all the Sure Start Centres to help the parents who struggle. They were genuinely beneficial to the community.
Sure, some children spend too much time on screens and this is undoubtedly a factor but I think it sometimes gets over egged. We should also be asking:
*Should a child be “school ready” by aged 4 or do we start kids too early?* I’m inclined to think the latter. Depending on when they are born, a child starting school may have not long turned 4. Of course they will have accidents. I’m not saying they should be wearing nappies to school, but let’s not forget how young they are when they are sent off to “big school”.
I also think the rise in the number of parents sending kids to nursery at very young ages, ironically, has impacted some children negatively. Nurseries can be great for getting kids to robotically name phonemes so they’re ready to start phonics in Foundation, but not so good in the sense that a very busy nursery, with underpaid and often under qualified staff, can’t recreate the 1:1 attention a (conscientious or competent) parent or other caregiver can offer their child in terms of developing talk and toileting skills.
For the parents who struggle or need to work, a good nursery can have a really positive impact, but unfortunately the standards are hugely inconsistent. This is the fault of government.
There are lots of simple soundbites we can throw around, like “bad parenting innit” and “too much screen time” and “it’s cos of lockdown” but it’s more complex- and maybe more worrying- than just those black and white assumptions.
Sure, those factors are important, but children have been starting school with fewer and fewer basic skills since before lockdown.
I am inclined to think that as a society, we have become overly distanced from our own children. People are busy, they have to work a lot to make ends meet, the government is throwing free childcare places at everyone whilst simultaneously disbanding other community initiatives, we have marvellous little electronic devices with which we can pacify children *and* the DfE thinks children should be sitting like little statues at a table from earlier and earlier. It’s a perfect storm in a nappy.